The unexamined life is not worth living FUCK GODDAMN IT I’M GOING TO EYE RAPE YOU GOD FUCKING SHIT DAMN!!

Holy hell I would have hated to be a voice actor for this game, about 90% off all dialogue is yelling. Its non-stop, all the time about all things. You will have entire scenes of people just screaming at each other about nothing at all really. Father and son at odds with each other? Better have them both yell about different things at the same time and throw the wife in there too we need a few more fucks sprinkled in. It can be extremely grating and it took me a while to get over. I almost shut the game off after the first few hours, it was that tough to take. It didn’t help that you also start off heavily playing as Franklin (the black guy). I may be totally off base here but he seems like another example of a white guy who doesn’t know a whole lot of black people trying to write as one. The dialogue was just a little too goofy, too “hey black people say homie and nigga right? Better have him say it as much as possible.” It got a lot better as the game went on but at first it was a bit much.

The story is actually quite well done, you grow to like all three characters and they play off each other well. The problem I have with this game is the same problem I’ve had with pretty much every GTA game and why I prefer the Saint Row series. GTA does a wonderful job of creating a big, vibrant world filled with goofy characters and fun things to do while looking great. It just goes too far. Or not far enough. The silly characters are entertaining but would have been much more so if they were turned up a few notches. They are just a little too realistic to be all that memorable and fun but not realistic enough to really work. The game constantly stops just short of being truly entertaining. A game like Saint Row says fuck it from word one and because of that it’s free to create the best experience possible (maybe going too far at times but still). I found myself saying “wow that was really cool if you ignore X, Y, and Z.” The rampant murder and extreme personalities fell somewhat out of place in this world. You’ll pull off a pretty realistic and awesome bank heist that causes the characters to lay low for a while then go on a mission where you kill like 50 guys and nothing really happens. It felt as if cartoon characters were living in our world. Didn’t quite work for me.

It’s still fun. It’s still GTA. You have a ton of stuff to do that’s varied and exciting. Some more-so than others, I could have done without the yoga mini-game, but even the more mundane ones are nice to have. The addition of the stats system is really fun as well, almost everything you do improves your character in some way. That always adds an extra bit of fun to a game. You never really get stuck doing the same thing over and over. You constantly want to push forward because each event gives you just enough to have fun but leaves you wanting more. Even some of the things that I usually hate (any time you have to fly) provided at least a little enjoyment.

GYA V is defiantly a game worth playing, as I’m sure you have, it’s just not my favourite type of game. From the first GTA on down I’ve never been that huge a fan, for whatever reason I just cannot connect to them as much as everyone else does. A great game but not the GREATEST GAME EVER MADE FUCK SHIT!!!!!!!

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆